--

today in my life, i am at a juncture which just eggs me to 'move on' mentally.
The holidays were just a pause in my study life.
Now, its moving on time.

well, it was surprising that i was early to TPJC this morning.
it wasnt even bright yet when i reached the school.
haha.
oh well, it was really peculiar, as in my heart, i was scared, nervous too.
it just seemed like a different type of wind was blowing against my face..
In me, was also a small tinge of dread and uncertainty.
But in my heart, i just told myself,"God, i knw its your plan, and i will walk the path you have paved for me. Whatever it is, i will make full use of what is before me."
i felt calmer then.

when i stepped into the hall, it was chaotic; not at all organised.
I took a long time just to find my orientation group as there werent any indication.
ok, soon after i settled down..
it was really boring as i didnt really have anyone to tlk to.
But well, just unexpectedly i started talking to people and made friends!
THe making friends part was rather sweet though.
But the orientation was firstly, not creative and secondly, it gave me the impression that the school is really slack.
you would understand why when u r there with me.
oh well.
just couldnt explain evrything in here.
whatever it is, i will go for the cca trials on wed in mjc and im hanging on to that small ray of hope.
But yet, still may it be God's will.

He has a plan for me.

results

today was THE day.
it was around 0800 when sixu called me on my handphone.
i was still half aslp thn when he asked, "hey, so where did u get posted to?"
my eyes then widen and i sat up with a jolt.
i answered in a singapore slang, " WHAT!? where got people wake up so early to check results one?" he thn replied, "go check la quick, out already."

So, i dragged myself down my bed and out of my room, booted the computer and logged into the website.
after keying in my IC no without fail, i saw, right before me, my results, the Verdict.
my eyes were literally fixated at the whole screen for minutes!
i just couldnt believe my eyes as tears welled up.
i was utterly disappointed.
i even re-logged in to check if they were really my results.
TAMPINES JUNIOR COLLEGE!
man, i dunno abt it..
all i can sae is that my heart felt heavy, my stomach curled into a tight ball, and i just couldn't smile.
then, it all seemed like a reflex action when i just bounced out of my chair and called shawn.
In my heart, there was only one thing to do, APPEAL.

i went to MJC with siwei who wanted so dearly to appeal too. We were like desperate souls.
well, throughout i received several encouragements and words of worry for me.
i was and am touched.
Thanks gong.
Thanks peeps.
Upon reaching MJC, i got the appeal form and here it goes. it was a really bad intro the teacher gave me though.

She started : what's your L1R5? Raw score please.
Fiona: ermm, 14.
She replied in a matter-of-fact tone: well, now the score to enter MJC, be it arts or science, is 12. and 12 is the RAW SCORE, NOT AFTER DEDUCTION.(she emphasized those words real clearly)
thn blah blah.. i filled in the form.

and this was how she bid me goodbye.
She said: well, i shall keep this and you will know if your appeal was successful latest by fri(10/3). If you do not get any reply from us by fri, it would mean that your appeal was unsuccessful. at the mean time, you would have to report to ur posted jc on mon.
*my heart sank and shouted a "whaAAAT!?"*
Fiona replied: okay, Thanks you sooooo much.

initially, i thot, what? so u mean i have to aimlessly stay in tpjc for the week? its crazy!
but well, i just had to express my gratitude real clearly for the fact tt she accepted my appeal though. haha. what could i say but to thank her?
so i left.

well, i guess like what xavier said, " God loves me and God has a plan for me. "
so i guess, whatever it is, i shall accept it.
all i need to do now, is to pray to be accepting.
o lord, hear my prayers, clear the mist that hinders my path Lord and help me to see it clear.

He never fails to bless me.

impossible

Upon receiving Shawn's phonecall, i swallowed my saliva, feeling a constriction in my throat. My heart literally gave a jolt.
On Shawn's previous message, he asked for my IC no. i gave it to him.
My insides were squirming when he said, with an apologetic tone,
"eh fiona, i think you are going to tpjc, not meridian."
i was like what!? how is this possible? How do u knw?
well, and he mention abt some system problem thing and also included that meridian jc just lowered its points for this yr's intake.
i was utterly speechless.
what can i say?
shawn then began, "nvm la.. relax, just appeal la.. dun worry, appeal for mjc, can already."
well, i guess thats what'll i will do.. can't do anything else can i?

i just wonder, is it because of my over-confidence, resulting in my lack of prayers that God gave me this result of going to tpjc instead?
God, if i now pray fervently for 3 days b4 release of results, will u make a change?
well, now im indeed in a point of preparing myself to accept what would come.
and truly, i am now really standing in the need of prayer.
prayer of acceptance and change.
whatever it is, im truly downcast, confused and worried.
oh well.

*p.s: Shawn is my sec sch fren who went to MJC for first three mths.*

God is in control.

anxiety

O lord, calm my anxious heart...

well, as much as i am filled with anxiety, i feel so inspired as well.
so so inspired. utterly inspired.
God has really been hanging on with me..
Evry step of my life, he has never failed to walk with me.
Boy am i blessed.
Writing my speech, thinking of what i want to share, praying so much for inspiration, God just gave it to me..
somehow, as i reflect, i feel that there is actually so many things in my life i feel so blessed abt.
i'm so happy to be who i am today, becos God brought me up..
Thinking abt God, just makes my eyes brim with tears.
He is like the wind somehow, i cant see him, but i feel him so strongly.
He has always been there.... never leaving me.
lol. wah, thn he can be my husband already, dun needa marry!
oh well, he has a plan for me still.. and i surrender it all to him..

right now, in my life, at this instance.. i just feel that God is within me.. living in my heart..
so close.. so intimate.. always there..
my heart beats becos he allows it to..
i breathe because evry breath is his love..

My God is an awesome God..

working

oh well... well, its 3:38pm now..
my brain juice is drained...
i just couldn't think of an incident in my life that i burst out after suppressing my bitterness for a long time..
i just couldnt remember!!! and i hve to!
forgetful me.. oh well.. argh, stressssseeeddd la.
just have to keep reminiscing abt my past and pray for inspiration..
O lord! i need the inspiration..
haha..

well, the weather seems to be having mood swings..
one moment it rains, another moment it turns sunny.
to think its e first time i brought an umbrella out and i didnt use it at all!!
when im out, it is sunny.. when im in, it just rains..
oh well, but i guess its a blessing in disguise somehow..

alright, im just thinking thinking thinking right now.. THINK!!!

heeelllllpppp!
oh, i guees, i would hve to sit on my thinking chair. hee hee.
but there are so many chairs.. dunno which one is my thinking chair. haha.

inspire me Lord!

--

one thing i just learnt not long ago:
A sheep is the stupidest animal among animals.
1. it cant be trained.
2. it has to be fed- if u leave it alone to graze, it will just munch on the same spot of grass
and eat up all the soil too! ewww.
3. it cant clean itself.
4. it cant defend itself

gosh, poor thing! can u believe it? its like a big baby! well, i guess thats why it needs a shepherd.
i think if they see danger, they would just go "baaaaaAaaa". lol so spastic.
but well, i would love to be a sheep.. its ok to be stupid, but at least i will be simple.. then, my dear lord will be my shepherd to lead the way.. how nice!! =)
oh well, but its just me sometimes, not allowing my shepherd to guide me along...
i think i hve been somehow in an imaginary world lately.. i guess somehow, when one's free,
he'll just imagine and imagine.. or perhaps build castles in the air.

so well, thats what i did.
but well, i just imagined abt being in heaven.. thn i thot, well, God loves me..
so i guess evry morning when i open the windows, the birds sing a love song for me. when i open the door, on the mat lies a bouquet of flowers to brighten up my day.. in my backyard, an apple tree with its trunk bearing my name and God's etched in a heart carved so perfectly. how beautiful!
when i sleep God tucks me in with the sweetest lullaby that he sings oh so sweetly in my ears..
he even tells me bedtimes stories if i couldnt sleep. Gosh, i love that!
i anticipate that day to come..

evryday, i just feel that in every air that i breathe, i take in God's love..
Life is Good, Heaven is awesome..
Oh father, how i long to be with you in eternity!!!
hee =D

everyday is a new day!

yipee

heee, just got a new skin..
dunno why, but was looking for sumthing simple..
so i thot this was beautiful... =)

God is awesome.
Thank you.

metanoia

"Life is useless, i have nth to live for"
"I'd rather die"
"Whats my purpose in life? suffer i guess"
" Life is stupid"

sound familiar? i guess its common these days.. how people actually think life can be so miserable..
for me, i admit, life can be a real chore itself.
life IS tough.
a peculiar feeling though, gazing at my vicinity from the corridor of my flat, i see greeeney, birds, the humongous blue sky that suspends over me. Not only that, but also the lovely fluffy clouds that float like marshmallows or cotton candy. Hey, thinking abt all these, i don't see life useless!
Its crazy how God gives us challenges in our lives, that sometimes, it really is challenging to think only of its beauty. Well, surely, even the most hideous thing has its own charm..
haha well, but the fact is that the earth and its wonderful nature is so beautiful by its own. Captivating and tranquil.
Its actually more sense that we humans are the ones pollute the beautiful earth God created. BEsides, he created nature first, didnt he?
Well, God created us because he loved us. BUt here i am, polluting it with my sins and discontentment.
Lord, father, thank you so much for the blessings you've showered me.

Now, its so true, whenever i go home, i look at every part of my hse with a different meaning and different perspective after shawn wooten's msg.
It just convinces me tt, in everywhere, there is a purpose, and from every mistake, is a chance to change.

The past week i had was mundane i can say.. lotsa thinking abt which school i wanna put in my choices.. but i knw God made me put what i chose.. so, no regrets.
sometimes, i just feel so much gratitude towards God, that i do not knw how to express it..

Father, thank you so much for ur flawless love for me.
Your love is patient, your love is kind , it doesnt envy, it doesnt boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, not self seeking, not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.Your love doesnt delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, trusts, hopes, perseveres.
Your love for me, NEVER FAILS.

O lord! i dont deserve it at all! but yet i am receiving it all!!
I knw lord, my life is never miserable because of you..
Besides, i am a foreigner in this land, my home is with you, in HEAVEN!

=)

valentines just passed, a whle ago....
gosh, just cant stand people carrying roses, standing outside the restaurants and holding hands with their dates.

if only, a dozen of roses and an iced latte.. thats all i ask for.
lol
im dreaming... seeing my date only in a vision...
oh misery.!
ok, i will wait.
i knw God is hinting me to wait cos he will provide a most perfect one soon.

but its crazy today.
sitting on the sofa the whole day, eyes fixated at the moving images in the tv.
cos im so addicted to this korean show now, so in love witht his guy Hyun bin.
jacinda and i were like couch potatoes.
well, doing this made me feel better abt not having a date.
thinking abt hyun bin is gd enough.
lol

but ok, ytd was still over and a brand new day begins.
so, well, its still another day afterall.

haha.

let me dream again.
----"candlelit dinner, cosy ambience, french restaurant, yummy cuisine, 99 roses, a quartet playing,a handsome date, a walk in the park, a nice movie to catch, handful of surprises, a nice sweet gift............." woo hoo. great DREAM.

valentines

petals of roses are falling from the velvety blue sky.
love is in the air.
and passion is burning, spreading through evry forest.

valentine's it is.
wonder how this name originated.
sounds all so lovey dovey.
and how am i gonna spend it?
lol
in the cutest way ever.

but well, sometimes, i just wish i had a date.
perhaps with Johnny Depp? van nistelrooy? i dun mind rooney.
how abt daniel radcliffe?
any korean actor, would be fine.
but well, the best would be one i love.
my fav bro? lol

but hey, im spending it in the most special way.
with my beloved sisters.
sound so les.
but hey, celebration of friendship u knw!
also, spending it with my Father in heaven...
frankly, this way of celebrating valentines is most fufilling of all!
haha.

i will treat God to iced latte and lotsa chocolates. i will sing his praises and glorify him.
i will love those around me, cos i love him.

oh well, how romantic is that? =)

but still, i knw God will give me a chance to spend a valentine's with one i love.
perhaps now, he just wants to hold on to me.
well, now, i still wanna love him even more first, b4 spending valentines with a human.
haha, romancing God....

but well, i knw tmr.. its going to be special...
perhaps not particularly for me..
but well, its a day of love.
and God is love.
and love, should be shared.
so what if i receive nth, let me give...
i wanna love.

its really amazing this thing called Love.
for life and living
the ought of giving
and a vow made for eternity.
its like oxygen
it lifts us up where we belong.
all u need is love!

f.aith

Faith is being sure of what i hope for and certain of what i do not see. Period.

im fine.
taking every step with faith is what i will do.
its gonna be great.
im super fine.
im calm.
im happy.
well, thats what i am telling myself.

but as friday is a step closer, i just start having trepidations, cold sweat and seizures, mental seizures. its crazy. i definitely sound like someone who has like Fits attack or something.
but truly, tts how i feel.
but yet again, its true tt God blesses. Its true that his plan is perfect and prosperous for me..

Here i am, standing in the need of prayer, and i truly pray for e best results.. college! college!
well, im swallowing my saliva. taking every step with lotsa caution.
i'm not going to be paranoid, i will not go berserk.
i will keep God in my heart, and walk straight forward.
Take e results, look at it, and move on.-with acceptance.

God loves me, i knw.
Lord, i knw u do.
Lord, all i ask for, is e best i can get, with a tinge of faith and courage.


i know u hear me.

Are we?

Just a few questions that bug me though...

Are we deep enough?
Are we truthful at all?
Are we united?
Are we loving enough?
Are we sparing a thought for one another?
Are we encouraging always?
Are we putting one another as our standards instead of God?
Are we only saying things but not doing them?
Are we anxious to make a change?
Are we eager to learn?
Are we humble enough to accept challenges?
Are we shining like stars to the world?

Whats the answer?

--

oh well, the song i was searching for ever since last week. and now, i have found it!!!! yipee! lemme share the lyrics.. if possible, this will be my wedding song... IN THE NEAR FUTURE. lol

Title: Give My Love
When I look in your eyes I can see that you
Want to be with me but you're so scared
And I don't know what to say or do
But the tears keep falling from your eyes
And I know that
Times won't change my love
And I can't do nothing to keep you

Oh, I'll give my love oh when I hold you tight
Give my love through kisses oh so bright
And you know that I can't change my love
Take my love all through the night

As the hours pass away
You think that love ain't here to stay
Feel a beat from your chest
But you don't give doubt a moment's rest
You dream the future and all you see is dark
Listen to your heart, baby, the truth will set sparks

Now I'll give my love oh when I hold you tight
Give my love through kisses oh so bright
And you know that I can't change my love
Take my love all through the night

u might laugh at the lyrics looking so weird without the tune.. but trust me, its a great song.. esp when now im in love with this show: Save the last dance for me..
great show, no joke alright. haha
100% fiona's recommendation.
=D
trust my taste alright.
haha

oh well,
God is awesome.
he shows me his powers everyday. how he can actually mke EVRYTHING possible.
and i believe and trust him with all my heart mind soul and strength that he will bless.
God u knw what i mean ya...
as much as i pace around with anxiety..
i knw i must face the truth... but help me to receive it with joy and acceptance.


your love for me is just so unrequited, unconditional, selfless, patient.. etc.. just like what 2 cor says..
Lord, u have evry quality of a perfect husband and dad..
i love you Lord.

*ok, back to work.


Ta!!

raindrops...

To you, O Lord I called;
to the Lord I cried for mercy:
"What gain is there in my destruction, in my going down into the pit?
Will the dust praise you?
Will it proclaim your faithfulness?
Hear O Lord and be merciful to me;
O Lord, be my help."
You turned my wailing into dancing;
you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy,
that my heart may sing to you and not be silent.
O Lord my God, i will give thanks to you forever.

Psalm 30:8-12

from here, i saw David's love for God, i saw his faith.
despite in distress, he trusts God and sings to him..
He pours his sorrows to God, emptying all his grief..
indeed, God is his friend, his confidant.

As i see these few days pass...
the gloomy skies..
the pitter patter of the raindrops, the gusts of winds that blow..
all is chilly and cold..
it seems that my vicinity is filled with only scarce streams of people...
few are out.. most running to nearby shopping ctrs not to shop but for shelter.
the weather immediately allowed me, to reflect upon my feelings, how i truly feel..
it allowed me to think upon my innermost thoughts and feelings.
especially when i am alone, i think even more..
my moods are dampened indeed.
but then, i think of my Father..
i think abt what David wrote..
"But i trust in you O God; i say, " You are my God."
My times are in your hands;
deliever me from my enemies
and from those who pursue me.
Let your face shine on your servant(David);
save me in your unfailing love."

Gosh when i read that, i was impacted by David's faith and love for God.
so how can i be here, bothering abt my dampened spirits when God will always pick me up and shower my with his love?

Well, for i know, God is love..

Its so interesting doing the psalms for my quiet time.. cos it reallie enlightens me abt hving faith and standing in awe of God.

alright, oh well, i just cant wait for today to cum and it is here.. FRIDAY! yipee im going to church and its the most encouraging thing that would happen.. =)
just reallie pray tt all would come.

ta! =D

pssst.

peek a boo.....!
alright =) here i am, back.!!! its been several days since ive penned my blog..
well, i was busy.. so, my apologies.
heh heh
Well, was looking after the little ones in my mom's childcare.. Gosh, is this a job at all? i just couldnt believe it! its just so fun and exhilarating! heeee.
oh well...
im just so happy that im like sitting in bible studies recently...
and im just looking so forward to the bible talk tt the 3 of us will be leading.. AWESOME!
well, just reallie unsure abt what lies ahead.
results, especially.
on sunday, while i was ushering, i got to tlk to this brother, xavier frm the east... (oso usher) and he said TP's good.. thn kynaston also added tt he wanted to go there.
at that instance i reallie felt my heart squirm.. just an odd feeling.. i thot, " what if i reallie can't make it to JC? will i reallie have to settle in a poly? no way, what a disppointment!"
well, its not tt i hate poly or despise it or sumthing... just tt, jc is my dream! it is!
the truth will be revealed real soon.. and i just hope tt i will jump for joy upon seeing my results and cry not becos im sad but just out of pure elation!
all i can do now, is to lay it all down to God.
at the same time, to really put effort into the teens ministry..
i pray so hard for all e teens...
pray so much for the unity of us all...
and our friendship..
just cant wait for fri and sun to arrive...
heee, and im going to usher again.. hopefully, i will not get so confused this time.. its like iim just so dumb at handling the trays or bread and wine.. but well, =) i love this job! reallie want to do it well...

well, at this moment, i feel so much in my heart.. lots of joy, bemusement, wonder, confusion and a little tinge of sadness.. if u asked me why, i would sae, i reallie dont knw.
there is so much in this world, the ugliness of it, the horror within i dun wish to know.. despite it being so tempting many times.. its just a mask, shielding all the motive and emptiness inside it. cos thats what the world is, full of emptiness and fill with vile and despicable baddies, not tt there arent any angels.
being in it, only makes me aimless and lost.
but im happy, God is here to pull be back lest i fall too far into the nothingness of the world.
The road to heaven, although tough, is a path i will tke and shall nvr regret.

ta!

first day of school

ytd was the first day of school for many many people..
well, not for me. free for the first 3 mths till i get my results... =( oh well, whether it is gd or bad i dun knw. i reallie am lost... well, although i mentioned i have plans and stuff.. but, one week has 7 days!!! not evryone has 7 days for me to spare! oh well.. the gerls are all busy working and i just finished working.. well, just thank God tt jacinda is quitting soon! lol. gosh. i'm bad.
reallie. it just feels weird. reaalie weird.
alright but ytd was awesome actually.
morning.... with jacinda cos she stayed over. did quiet time tgt, and prayed... while my bro played at e playground.thn we walked to compasspoint to eat macdonald's. it was sort of a first day of sch treat for my bro.. hee. thn we shopped for awhle and walked nic to sch. jacinda and i just looked like aunties man. totally!
so thn.. we were reaalie bored.. jacinda still in a dilemma whether to go to work onot. she didnt wanna go to work partially becos of her swollen foot and oso becos, oh well, hee of me rite.. i guess... so we msged sharon and met her at Cp and we spent time at cafe galilee where the ice latte wasnt sweet enought unless u added at least half a cup of syrup. alright so we talked and talked like crazy. i mean considering sharon, such an aunty.. how can we talk less?
alright.. so it was reallie fun as we planned for a bible talk for valentine's... so look forward to it.. but its just a proposal at the moment.. pending........
so alright... somehow.. sharon had to go to work and jacinda shopped with me for awhle.. haha its like e whole day longg its actually me who needed company.
jacinda thn went for NPCC. i went home to.. well, sleep. JUST FOR AWHILE. and i had to pick my bro up frm sch. i waited, being one of e earliest to pick e kid up.. thn soon many kids emerged, no sign of nick.. till awhile later.. i saw this little boy, perspiring with his bad slinged on only one side of his shoulder, one hand holding a tissue paper stained with blood. it was nick! lol
i asked, what happened? he didnt sae... thn well, i found out.. he dropped his milk tooth!!! hahahaha
okay.... the rest of e day was like a routine... so nth much. ta!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Happy 2006!
well, i admit im always rather outdated in updating blogs. i always write a few days affter the event occured and all.... too bad, im a busy person =P
but well, i truly wanna express my happiness in welcoming this brand new yr.
its just so awesome... celebrating new yr countdown in church. we have this wow wow west thing... and well, i dressed up like little bo beep.. or a gypsy, or perhaps a cowboy's wife u can sae... lol but xavier just claimed i looked like a maid. fine. =/ haha
but it was great... just having fun giving myself a brand new start to start anew with resolutions and prayers.
What was more awesome was our meeting on monday 2/1/06. well, some of us got tgt.. and discussed our visions for the teens ministry. gosh, i reallie anticipate a great yr of growing spirituality and repentance for all. just feel so much for the teens.. they r my family i can sae.
and well, for the first three mths, im going to be one of the most 'NOTHING TO DO" person. reallie feel empty and lost cos evryone has started sch... but well, now, i reallie set my heart to spend this threee mths helping the teens to grow.. =)
gosh, its reallie a mystery how these 3 mths will be.. but i'll tke a step of faith =)

Back

Gosh! im back frm this reallie awesome retreat with the teens to penang. Reason why im writing only now when i actually came back on sunday is becos i fell sick and still am, only tt im much better now.
well, you'll nvr understand the fun i had unless you were there wif me.
We got to knw the teens frm penang and KL and did lotsa charity stuff like cleaning the old folks home, advertising for the HOPE clinic. realllie cool..
it was a great time building frenship wif the other teens... and well, i reallie miss them.. (the kl and penang teens i mean) enjoyed the learning cantonese part, and hanging out with thm part.. =( oh well...
i just cant explain how much ive learnt.. cos its reallie alot! Even with my fellow teen brothers and sisters... i felt much closer to thm too..
Went down to Ipoh oso, to go trek in the caves.. was realie exhilarating.
time reallie flew... but i guess tt how we feel when we are having so much fun.
this experience to penang, will definitely be etched in my mind, in my heart... cos its utterly worth remembering. =) Thank you Lord for making this possible...

craziness

can u believe this? its orchard road for ur infomation. ORCHARD ROAD! ok, im not trying to be this retard or something. but it really has been ages since i've been there! Ages!!! so ok, ytd, i was finally there. Yippeeeee!
so happy that the Os are like over and done. =)
sometimes, i really wonder, how feelings are defined.1. An affective state of consciousness, such as that resulting from emotions, sentiments, or desires,2.Intuitive awareness or aptitude; a feel.
ok, thats frm the dictionary.
haha. but sometimes, feelings just are more complicated. A simple explanation but yet a different taste of it. Get me?
Well, indeed im someone who feels like tremendously. And, oh well, i can say i just feel at e slightect things u can ever imagine. BE it feeling touched, sad blah. but well, dont worry, i just dun feel so much when it cums to anger. but ok, joy.. ya joy oso perks me up almost instantly.
oh well, lately, SOME things made me feel alot. Sad actually, with a tinge of guilt. oh well, just dun wish to talk abt it cos now im talking abt feelings not the situation or plight im in. but truly, its just so hard to face certain feelings and in the end u just get so lost, eventually not knwing how to solve the situation.
well, but i knw, its just most important to knw to do the right thing.
just reallie wish tt i will be understood some how.
well, but i knw, no one understands me better thn God.
ok. enough of sadness.
cos its craziness now.
ORCHARD RD ytd was gr8. so christmassy and all. plus, i get to hang out wif like so many close frens. its great to hve frens around. went to like shop for silvia's tennis skirt, thn went ahead to the coffee dunno wat. forgot the name. think its cofee express or something. went there to rest and wow it sure was cosy in there. wen ate this mud pie and it was yummy!! Sera ate this cute little country pie thingy. which looked really delicious. but i was stuffed with the long john silver lunch i had before and didnt feel like eating. lol. we had real fun helping EJ decide abt quitting his job. gosh, he sure was wavering so much abt it. haiyo, ej, just tell him. I QUIT. simple. lol. but well, in the end, he was really brave and professional to actually mke the resignation call. hahaha. alright, thn we eventually made our way home. and i walked home with ej and sera. haha. so funny, sera finally knew Old Chang Kee's squid head tasted nicer thn the squid meat itself. lol. so well, sera, squid head! remember! hee, i like squid head too.
*****on the phone wif gwen at the moment*****
ok, put down phone already.
she seemed to have a sore throat due to the mud pie she ate ytd. lol
oh well, wish i can go work with her.
ok, so ytd night, ej and sera came to my house. to get the harry potter vcds i promised EJ. so ok, they were standing at e corridoor and my maid got this super absurd shock when she saw thm outside. gosh, it was like so ridiculous. couldnt believe she gets shocked seeing ppl outside e door.
ok so i hve plans today, plans to go out of cos.
too bad, couldnt hang out wif e rest tonight to watch harry potter.. but well, i'll be watching it TMR!!! yipee!!! so happy!!!! =)

alright ending here. i'll be back.
btw, i got this super cool water bottle tt can keep water cold for a LOOONNNNGGG time!!!

A Letter To My Lord

Dear Lord,
Good morning! well, its just a sudden decision here that i just had this urge to type to you. Lord, i truly praise u so much for being there for me, being my Father. Lord, if it wasnt for you, I wouldnt hve gone through Life the way it is now. I would have long been taunted by the obstacles in life and influenced by the strong magnetic pull of the world. But, Lord, its you who guides me through torrential rains and droughts, its you who pull me back when i step too far in into the pit. And Lord, just a big thank you for that.
Well Lord, now, i can say, is a crucial point in my life. A small part it is, but it can make a whole lot of difference in my life- MY O Levels. Lord, its half down, sort of. I still have abt 7 papers more, in four days, and Lord, i truly pray that Lord, you'll give me the wisdom and strength. Becos, truly i need it so much. i pray that i will really finish my exams, praising you, thanking you that i've done well, and not regret becos of this time that you were with me through and through. i knw Lord, that its so much of my own effort too. So Lord, pls guide me t o the way that is right, and bring me away frm temptations and being ill- disciplined.
Lord, i want to keep you first in my life forever, i want to have this awesome relationship with you, that my love for you shall never, at any time, dwindle. Lord, i ask you for now, a small request: Lord, BE with me, to do well please. i need you.so much.
Another request Lord: i pray for many others who are tking there exams now, and also, Lord, please be with evryone.
Thank YOu LOrd, i surrender evrything in to your hands, i love you.
Amen.